i've been hopping from one blog to another. creating new one then leaving it. for short, i'm always getting 'awol'. then here i am, once again, finding my way back in xanga. .

it's been sooooo long. and i missed it. i miss the people who read my post then react to it. i miss reading other people's lives. i miss the 'learning thing' in blogging.

i blog because i wanted to share what i have to other. my thoughts and opinions can somehow help others. i blog not because, this is what's 'in' right now.

really, i started blogging before it went so famous. but yes, i always get 'awol'. now, that i've grown up, i learned how to be a responsible blogger. i stopped blogging before, because i hurt someone's feeling through my words. misunderstood- misinterpreted- or whatever term it may be- but i was then so reckless, immature, and irresponsible human being. i did not think of my words would affect someone so dear to me..

now, i'm back. and i promise to stand to what i want to do-- i try my best not to be 'awol' this time again.

so, welcome me back and wish me luck. 

i am 19.

i'll be turning 20 this september. in my existence in this chaotic world, i had two serious relationship with the opposite sex.. but i'm proud to tell all of you that i am still a virgin. though, for me i go a little beyond my boundaries but still i am a virgin.

this is not to scrutinized those who are 'not' anymore. but this is to show that i stand by what i believed in. i still believe that my purity is the best gift that i can solely give to my future hubby. although, as i read cosmo, most pinay nowadays don't give a big damn if they are still virgin or not. really, that's true. but still, i stand even if i'll be mocked around and be laughed around by my friends.

i am open to the topic of it. i won't say yuchh or eww, instead i talked about it. then again, i won't do it.

in my part, i have a firm stand on what i believed in. the problem is, can i still find a guy today who share the same belief as i am? who is willing to control his urges to wait for the right time?

i don't know.. i wish god grant me the person who will respect my ideals and perspective in life--especially in SEX.

  i usually have 'taho' in the morning.

but today, i think i might skip this one.

my head is throbbing.. i was able to sleep last night, i guess, it was 2 in the morning already. this is because of a dream.

yesterday afternoon, i had a nap. it was a good dream at the start until from nowhere this scene pop outs wherein my tooth just fell out. you know how weird dreams are? so when i wake up, i told my aunt about my strange dream. i told her that it was so real, that when i wake up i directly looked for a mirror. really, it scared the hell out of me!! then my aunt told me to 'knock on the wood' for dreams like that symbolizes something bad might happen. so i felt a litle bit scared. but i just let that dream slip itself away.

and at night, i wasn't that sleepy, so i read a book, twisted by jessica zafra, to all my surprise and to all coincidence that my fate brought to me, a part of the article i read was about her friend who also had a dream like mine.. oooohhh!! i felt creepy already... and it tells the same thing, "something bad might happen". spooky..spooky..spooky..

after so many twist and turn. left-side to right-side and vice-versa. i finally dozed off. thank god, the dream wasn't like that anymore.